Forgiveness

   Last night I made a mistake. A horrible mistake. I allowed myself to get all worked up about something, and ended up almost ruining a friendship with someone I don't know very well. What bothers me the most is that God told me, not to do it. I could feel that it would turn out badly, and for some reason I didn't believe it. Then I wished a thousand times that I hadn't been so stupid.
   I was sorry afterwards, and apologised to this friend, but even though she said she forgave me, she kept pointing out all the ways I did wrong. I kept apologising and she kept saying that she forgave me, then pointing out another way I did her wrong and how much I hurt her. Eventually she told me to stop saying sorry. I told her that I would stop saying sorry when she forgave me. Even though she is a "christian" she had no concept of forgetting being part of forgiving. She kept insisting she had forgiven me, and then bringing it up again. But she was just using empty words.
   Forgiving someone when they have wronged you is really hard. I mean truly forgiving them. Letting go of all resentment in your heart, not seeking revenge, not attempting to make that person feel bad about what they did.... It's hard. But if you do not forgive someone, they are not forgiven. God says "As far as the east is from the west, so far have I removed your sin after I forgave you." God tells us that when he forgives us of something, it is gone. He will never bring it up again and hold it against us. I am so glad, because if he used all the things he has forgiven me for against me, that would be horrible.

~Melody